Morbid

[jetpack_monkey]

I don't know why this thought struck me when it did, or why it struck me at all. I'd rather it hadn't. As I was closing my laptop before turning in for the night, it struck me. Someday, my mother will die and I'll have to go to her funeral.

I've always known that, of course. It's the first time I've believed it, though, and I'm really rather upset right now.

Comments

[kenobi.livejournal.com]

Its a horrible feeling knowing eventually your parents will die. -hugs- When my mom went into the hospital for both of her surgeries for her brain.. I'd be watching her from behind the plastic expecting to hear that she didn't make it, and that we'd have to prepare her funeral.

Those moments are always the hardest. Your chest clenches up, and you feel like you can't breathe.

Just call her when you get up and remind her that every minute of her wonderful life that you love her.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

And of course I get her voicemail. Ah, well.

I think I'll call my sister while I'm at it. And think evil things about Dad.

[netgirl-y2k.livejournal.com]

I think it's one of those horrible thoughts that everyone has from time to time. Once, when dropping my mum off at the airport I had a hideous row with her and I couldn't stop thinking that in the event of something awful happening on her trip the last thing I would have done was shout at her and chuck her out of my car.

[kittycat22.livejournal.com]

*hugs you bunches*

I tend to randomly realize that about both my grandmother and my father... and I hate it. It's the worst feeling. Call her up in the AM, remind her of how much you love her. Cause the only real loss is when we don't say that enough.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I keep getting voicemail. Now I'm worried. Not very worried, but just a smidge.

Phooey.

[bitterbyrden.livejournal.com]

Go to her funeral? Son, you'll probably have to plan it. It's a drag to grow old, but it's a fact that if all goes well, we outlive our parents. In a way, it's our duty to attend their death with as much love, respect, caring, and humility as we can muster.

That said, I'm going to be a complete and total mess. So I hear you.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Well, to my twisted benefit, I'm completely at odds with my father and his entire side of the family, so if he kicks it in the near future, I won't have to worry about going, much less putting it together. Callous? Yes. Necessary for my continued mental health? That, too.

I called my mother and, just for good measure, my sister. Voicemail for both. *sigh*

[tinylegacies.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

I get hit with those thoughts every once in a while and they always freak me out too.

[qkellie.livejournal.com]

That's never a fun realization. I'm so sorry. :(

[diannelamerc.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[sideofzen.livejournal.com]

I think about that some times. And having to plan it. And how I would not be able to speak at her memorial service because I would be so broken.

[midnightfae.livejournal.com]

*Hugs* You could have woken me, if you'd wanted. Always know that, k?

I think about it a lot actually, though I don't talk about it. You can tell, because I get more defensive of my mom than I used to, and more flippant about her disability. It's why 'The Body' hit me so hard. She's not going to be around forever, and I can see the evidence of that...

*hugs* I know how you feel.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I know. But I was very tired and I'm better now. Although I can't seem to get ahold of Mom on the phone.

[midnightfae.livejournal.com]

*looks at the icon* Is that a hint? Do you want coffee? I'm about to head out the door (in about 15 minutes or so, so there can be coffee.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Nah, I just like the icon.

[musicforcylons.livejournal.com]

Sucks huh? *passes over a pint*