Cold Turkey

[jetpack_monkey]

The last couple weeks have been both very strange and oddly familiar. On the Wednesday before Christmas, I left fandomhigh completely. Not just as an admin, but also as a player. While I still keep in touch with everyone, it's been very weird to not have a million things to look after, decide about, organize. I'm starting to create very silly things for myself to do in order to pass the time, like doing a lot of memes and working on new websites that I know I'm never going to launch.

In short, when I said that I was planning on spending January very bored, I was right. And I don't like it. It's very weird to suddenly go from being necessary and useful to being free of responsibility and just... there. I have grand designs on what I'd like to do, but I'm running into the same ruts that plagued me before Fandom High -- that is, I really want to work on my writing, but I hate to write. It's like extracting blood from underneath my fingernails. I love having written, of course, but who doesn't?

With 2006 just 12 hours away, I need to figure out what I'm *doing* with myself in the new year.

Very scary prospect, having nothing to do. Must rectify it. My ego depends on it.

Comments

[diannelamerc.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I know what you mean. (I, of course, get the annual birthday "reflect back on your year" and the New Year's one both at the same time. Believe me, I know what you're talking about. :-p)

*hugs* If I think of anything brilliant I'll pass it along. :-p