Jetpack Monkey Meets a Social Life: An Incredible Adventure

[jetpack_monkey]

So I might be actually doing something with myself non-coffeehouse related tonight. I was at the Willow House last night when one of the baristas handed me a flyer for a show (featuring bands with names like "Andrew Jackson Jihad") and told me that I was absolutely going. I balked a bit, at which point Cute!Barista turned around and explained that my lame excuses did not work and that I would be attending this show.

I should explain Cute!Barista. Cute!Barista is a really awesome Willow House employee who I flirt with incessantly and who flirts back, also incessantly. She's very cool, likes horror movies, and is originally from Iowa. She's about the only flirtation I allow, since it falls under the "Barista Will Not Date You" clause of the social coffeehouse contract, so I'm not in any fear of breaking my no-dating vow, which is running through to at least December 1st.

I did, however, make an ass of myself at that point and asked her if she was going, with the right amount of inflection that indicated that this was the deal-breaker. She deadpanned that she would, in fact, be there in a monkey costume doing a belly-dance. I can't tell if she was joking but I sure hope not. That is the hottest thing ever.

I'm still sort of back and forth about whether I'm actually going or not. I have this whole problem with large crowds. At 6'7", I always have the feeling that I'm sticking out, that everything I'm doing is being magnified. Being around that many people tends to make me extremely self-conscious. On the other hand, I've been looking to see a gig, so to speak, for ages.

We shall see.

Comments

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Oh, I appreciate it. I'm just apprehensive as hell here.

And you're right. Belly button + monkey costume = woot.

I should go. I know I should go. *hits brain*

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

I would totally go with you if I was, you know, in the same time zone. =)

The code of "Thou Hast No F-ing Chance With The Barista" notwithstanding, you do stand a decent chance of making a new, intelligent, witty friend if you go. Living in a place with friends I can count on my thumbs, I can tell you this isn't something to casually pass by. Also, let me reiterate: monkey belly dancing. Even if she's not doing it, she came up with the concept. Woot indeed.

If it helps, you can think of the experience as research for writing. Surely you can come up with the script for a horror film that starts with a tall boy going to a show.

I'm wondering if that previous paragraph should go in the pro or con column, actually...

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

"And now for our hardcore Andrew Jackson Jihad finale, we're going to avenge our Native American brethren and EAT YOUR BRAINS!"

"Oh my God, the band's going to kill us! And they're totally missing the point about repatching relations between ourselves and an indigenous race that we nearly wiped out!"

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

Dude -- that would be awesome. I would watch that film.

Attack of the Pretentious Grad Student Band! (dramatic chord)

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

"They came from suburbia. Caucasian boys who wanted to prove they were sensitive to the causes of the world. Only the flesh of the human brain would assuage their white guilt. Look out behind you! You may be the next to fall prey to their intellectual seductions..."

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

Oh, man. I feel like we owe it to the world to make this film.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

It should totally have an old school retro-50s trailer in black & white with huge titles like "THRILL!" "GASP!" and "DENY!" Also, there needs to be an evil and/or kindly professor type.

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

And their amps must go up to eleven.

There should also be really big academic words that make no sense on the retro trailer, like, "Socio-economic infidelity!"

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

We could call it "Political Animals" and have it be about a band that turns into brain-craving monsters by the light of the full social cause. They bite a young Republican who finds himself supporting gay rights and *gasp* questioning the President. He fears that by the next concert date, he too will be a... (trailer voice) POLITICAL ANIMAL!

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

You are a mad genius, Nate. The world NEEDS this story.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I really agree. I'll start sketching out the details. It'll be easy to write because I know cheese-mo horror so very well.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

By the way, airawyn and I have determined that you're coming out to San Diego for ComicCon in July. You cannot resist us.

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

oOo, that sounds like fun. I haven't been to San Diego since 2000, and that was a conference for a job I had then. It was not a true San Diego experience.

When is Comic-Con, exactly? July's actually a pretty good travel month for me.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

July 14-17, if I remember correctly.

http://www.comic-con.org - I'm going. airawyn is going. veggiebelle will be there. Joss hasn't missed a year in a while, although he's usually a late announcement and I can't guarantee anything. We have a whole bunch of Buffy obsessed friends who are going.

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

That sounds pretty rad. I've never actually been to a con before. I'm not entirely sure what it entails, to be perfectly honest with you. =)

I'm leaving to go to Colorado to snowboard tomorrow morning. Don't know when I'll be able to get internet before Sunday. Hopefully I won't break anything while I'm there; I'm a bit injury-prone when I'm on skis or a snowboard. Probably has something to do with being a bit reckless.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

That sounds rad. I haven't been to Colorado in forever. And hey, same time zone and everything.

Oh, and I've received a message stating that your Super-Spy Ex will send rabbits after you if you don't come to Comic-Con .

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

Rabbits? Run away! Run away!

I think it sounds totally fun. Are you planning on getting a hotel, or do you have friends you're going to stay with? If you're getting a hotel, I'd like to stay in the same place if possible just to make things easier. It would suck to get lost, and considering I get lost *everywhere*, it would be pretty inevitable otherwise.

Last time I was in Colorado was two winters ago. I went snowboarding and bruised two ribs on my digital camera the first day (it was in a pocket and I fell forward), but kept snowboarding and ended up with The Great Ass Bruise of 2002, which was the size of my fist and black for two weeks. I have pictures.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I have a couple options for the stay, but a hotel is looking like the most tempting at this point if I can get a roomie or two.

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

Chalk me up for roomie-ness. I'm good.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Sweet. I shot veggiebelle an e-mail about good places to stay.

[hjcallipygian.livejournal.com]

Great. I check my LJ listed e-mail every day that I'm not in another state where I can't get to the internet, so if you want to e-mail me instead of using LJ comments, that's cool. =) It's hj.diablo at gmail.com.