Fic I'd Never Thought I'd Write

[jetpack_monkey]

I never write porn. I never write slash. I really don't understand the Spander 'ship. Yet alcohol and some sort of weird neural co-mingling with airawyn produced the following 250+ words:


The thing about sex with vampires, Xander found, is that you got used to the room temperature touch. Not only that, you started to like it. You started to need it. Take now, for instance. Spike was at the foot of the bed, smirking and actively not touching Xander. He didn't touch his thighs. He didn't run his palms over his stomach. He didn't trace a finger up the length of his cock. Xander groaned at all the not touching. "Come on!"

"With you all twitchy like this? I could go forever, Harris."

"I'll not touch you back."

"Oh, no. Whatever will I do without my big, lunky carpenter to take care of me?"

"Shut up."

Surprisingly, Spike did shut up at that point. Less surprisingly, it was because he had Xander's cock in his mouth.

Xander's hands clenched the bedsheets as Spike's cool tongue worked its will on his shaft, and shuddered when Spike's cool hand explored the rest of his body. The sensation felt like the doctor's office, when they put that cold, impersonal metal stethescope on your back and asked you to breathe deep. That moment of another human being examining your body closely, intimately, and with perfect instruments. Xander felt those perfect instruments all over him now as he came in Spike's mouth.

Spike swallowed, of course, and Xander wondered if vampires even had a gag reflex.

He rolled over to the edge of the bed and pulled his pants back on. In a few seconds, Spike would demand his turn, Xander would threaten his life, Spike would insult him and stalk out... but he'd be back next week. Xander might crave the cold, but Spike craved giving it to him.


Uh, feedback appreciated. Beta'd in the sense that airawyn looked it over very late at night and didn't point anything out, flaw-wise.

ETA: I also have a non-porny new Doctor Who icon based on the recently released Season 3 promo pics (it's so hard to keep spoilers out of this kind of text). It's not enough to constitute a new post over at jetpackvampire, so here it is:

Comments

[qkellie.livejournal.com]

Wow. I feel all perved out now. Good job. I haven't read Spander in literally a year or so, and now I remember why I ever read it in the first place. Reowr.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_jealousy_/]

What she said. Except for the feeling perved out part, because that never happens. ;)

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

That's a challenge if ever there was one.

[timeofchange.livejournal.com]

Beta'd in the sense that [info]airawyn looked it over very late at night and didn't point anything out, flaw-wise.

That would be because there isn't any flaw.

*g*

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Well, thanks! I appreciate it.

[kajivar]

Wow...great job!

You have taken your first step on a dark, dark path. ;)

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I know. Nasty filthy Spanders. They've taken our slash innocence, and we wants it back!

Which'll never happen, of course. *g*

[kittycat22.livejournal.com]

I feel dirty.

Also, you should say in your ETA what S3 you're speaking of, as almost all of my favorite shows are coming into their very own S3 right now. ;)

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Dirty or drrty? There's a distinction.

*g*

[mara-sho.livejournal.com]

You know, sometimes it's a good idea to stray outside of the norm when it comes to writing - and this is very definitely one of those times! The thing that really makes this shine is the fact that the characterisation is so... spot on. Nicely done!

(And I love that icon too! I'm snagging it - with credit of course!)

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Very cool. I was inspired to make it by your passel of 10/Martha icons, actually.

[mpoetess.livejournal.com]

*so. much. love.*

That is indeed perfectly in-character, and had me cracking up at "I'll not touch you back..."

Also *points and laughs* Now you have S/X cooties, OMG!

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you like. I was actually thinking "I hope mpoetess likes this. I'd feel silly if I not only wrote Spander, but *bad* Spander."

And I do not have cooties.

[mpoetess.livejournal.com]

*soothes* I understand how hard it can be to admit something like that in public, but hon, every one of us has had a cootie problem at some point in our lives. It's okay. We're here for you.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's it. I am definitely going to Writercon next time, because I have to kill you now.

...unless your icon distracts my attention span long enough for me to forget what I was talking about.

Huh?

[mpoetess.livejournal.com]

kimera: ...isn't the next writercon not till 2008?
jyuu_chan: Something to look forward to!
mpoetess: yeah, it's every other year I think
kimera: jetpackmonkey: *shows up*
kimera: No one else: *is there*
celestialnature: Tell him he has to come to connexions to do it!
mpoetess: *dies*

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Note the use of the term "next time." I have infinite patience... unless I don't.

...and there's a Con for slashers? I should be far less surprised.

[kimera.livejournal.com]

*squeaks happily*

eeeee!

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Glad you like!

[timjr.livejournal.com]

Dude. Text on the icon is LOVE.

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

Thank ye.

[midnightfae.livejournal.com]

Not sure what I think about the Xander/Spike chemistry (as an overall thing) but it works here... but why is Spike *cold*, shouldn't he be like, 72 degrees or something?

That niggling thought aside, the writing is fabulous. :)

[jetpack-monkey.livejournal.com]

I make it clear early on that I'm talking room temperature. Human recall being the way it is, the sensation of flesh that is not 95+ degrees usually makes our brain say "cold."

Touch a corpse sometime. *g*

[midnightfae.livejournal.com]

Right... that's where I was confused. You did mention room temperature and then mentioned things that made it seem as if you were referring to the something *very* cold, not just cool.

*grins evily* You think I can hide all these bodies without ever touching them?