5 Things Meme, Part the Hair

[jetpack_monkey]

For coltsbane:

Five careers Jack Bristow pursued after Fandom High:

1. "The most prudent course of action would be eggplant on the walls with a lavender accent. The furniture may have to go, but that's a calculated risk I'm willing to accept. Your primary objective is to agree that you have no taste and allow me to control the design of your living room."

2. "And shuffle, shuffle, kick, and turn turn turn... and lose the pants turn turn... Jazz Hands! And final kick, power slide." Bristow's eyebrow raised .76 millimeters. "Ricardo, if I see you fall behind the rest of the line one more time, there will be repercussions. I am not the sort of choreographer you want to displease. Take it from the top, men."

3. "Welcome to Chuck E. Cheese's."

The mother looked a little shocked. "It's so... quiet here."

"The children were becoming a liability to the overall enjoyment factor. I have them removed. Here is your claim ticket. You may pick up your son when you leave."

4. "Rangers, Rita Repulsa has sent a new menace to Angel Grove. You must defeat her. The fate of the planet is in your hands."

The lead Ranger's mouth shrank without visibly moving. "Of course, Zordon. We will of course take any strategem you may offer into consideration." He pulled out his morpher. "It's morphin' time."

Soon, the Power Rangers, led by the new and strangely disquieting Black Ops Ranger, defeated the monster using an ambush tactic that hadn't seen use since Guatemala in the mid-1980s.

5. Angel was almost sure that the Lorne in Fandom said Caritas would be at this address in LA. He and Logan entered and were immediately greeted by a familiar face that was all-too-not-green.

"Angel. Mr. Echolls. Please, have a seat. You will be singing 'I Got You Babe' by 1960s pop duo Sonny & Cher, immediately after Mordar the Bentback finishes his number. I will be monitoring your breathing rate, eye movements, and body language, and from there build an analytical profile of what your possible destiny might entail." Bristow sipped his Sea Breeze. "Would you care for a beverage? Mr. Echolls, you're underage, but I'm positive that Janine could make you a Shirley Temple."

Five ways Jack Bristow showed just how much of a bad-ass he is:

1. He killed a man with a spoon. What more do you want?

2. He watched a 24-hour marathon of Carrot Top's greatest hits... and emerged unscathed.

3. He deprogrammed Tom Cruise.

4. Dude, sex with Irina Derevko. That's living dangerously. Yowza.

5. He killed Chuck Norris.

For sarakat:

Five hairstyles Angel should never have tried:

1. Bouffant
2. The Donald
3. Dreads
4. Feathered Mullet
5. Jheri Curl

For midnightfae:

Five all-time FH OTP:

1. 6/Wednesday
2. Rory/Anakin
3. Angel/Logan
4. Vala/Cam
5. Cally/Anders

Five all-time non-FH OTP:

1. Jaye/Eric
2. Wes/Gunn
3. Syd/Weiss
4. Xander/Faith
5. The Doctor/Rose/Jack

Five other careers JD considered:

1. Manicurist, because you get all the best gossip.
2. Lifeguard, except he's afraid of sharks.
3. Toy tester, because omgcool.
4. Taxidermist, because everyone should have a friend like Rowdy.
5. Pluto at Disneyland. Can you imagine the joy he'd bring to children everywhere?

For bellatemple:

Five ways Weiss and Marshall passed the time when Vaughn and Sydney were on a mission:

1. Sit in Jack's chair and take turns pretending to be a humorless bastard. They only did this the once, however, because of the disturbing notes they found on their own desks the next day.

2. Argue about who would construct the Ultimate Superhero Squad of Ultimate Coolness. They keep butting heads about Reed Richards vs. Plastic Man. Oddly, it's Marshall who wants Plastic Man.

3. Play Halo on Marshall's X-Box.

4. Weiss tries to teach Marshall magic tricks, but the techie keeps coming up with gadgets that would duplicate the same effect with less effort, completely missing the point.

5. Watch Marshall's SETI screensaver for hours on end.

Five ways Weiss wants to leave his mark on Fandom High:

1. Have his very own OTP.

2. Save a damsel in distress.

3. Give people a reason to laugh on Friday nights.

4. Be known as the "there for you guy" to all the ladies of the dorm.

5. Find a Vaughn and have a hetero OTP.

Five things Weiss always wanted to say to Vaughn but never did:

1. "Dude, stop being a douche."

2. "Lauren's a nice girl and all, but... ah, how do I put this? Do you need an extra blanket at night?"

3. "Dude, seriously. Stop being such a douche."

4. "You call me weird? Your relationships end, and you go crazy and near-suicidal until you shack up with the next ice queen who debriefs you. I'm thinking building ships in bottles is relatively sane and well-adjusted."

5. "Hey, if you're not going to be dating Sydney, can I?"